Taking parents seriously

How is parenthood viewed in our society – as a performance, or as a meaningful but inherently unfinished task? Everyday reality shows that in the 2020s, parenthood is shaped by the pressures of multiple expectations. Balancing work and family life, financial concerns, and phenomena affecting children’s lives – such as the digital environment, learning difficulties and loneliness – place a strain on parents. At the same time, traditional forms of community support have weakened.

The starting point is clear: no parent manages alone – nor should they have to. Good enough parenting is sufficient, but even that requires the support of others, well-functioning services and a positive climate.

Listening builds trust

Supporting parenthood begins with listening. Research shows that parents do not always express their own needs, particularly when attention is focused on the child. Yet the wellbeing of the parent is directly linked to the wellbeing of the child.

A key question is therefore: do we ask parents enough?

A parent is an expert in their own life situation. The role of a professional is not only to offer solutions, but above all to pause, listen and understand. When a parent feels genuinely heard, trust is built – and with it, the possibility of effective support. The experience of being seen and taken seriously can significantly strengthen a parent’s coping.

Support is built together – in services and in everyday life

Support for parenthood is not limited to individual services, but forms a whole built through everyday encounters. Day-care centres, schools, health and social services and organisations are all settings where parents can be met naturally.

In a joint pilot programme by the Finnish Institute for Health and Welfare, the Finnish National Agency for Education, the Wellbeing Services County of Southwest Finland and the City of Turku, support for parenthood has been approached in a new way. A key precondition of the programme has been that development starts from parents’ own needs – not from predefined assumptions. In the first phase, the aim has been to learn: what kind of support do parents actually need, and how should it be made available so that it reaches every parent equally.

In the pilots, for example, schools have been used as platforms for supporting parenthood. Parents have been asked which themes they wish to discuss, and activities have been designed based on their wishes. Attention has also been paid to invitations, interaction and atmosphere – ensuring it is easy to participate without barriers.

Preliminary observations point in the same direction: even small changes in ways of working can increase participation and trust. When parents are involved, services better meet their needs and support is experienced as meaningful.

Communities and peers are part of the solution

Support provided by professionals is important, but it is not sufficient on its own. Peer support and communities are also a key part of supporting parenthood. Other parents, everyday encounters and shared experiences can offer a kind of understanding and support that no service can fully replace.

It is essential to strengthen the places and situations where parents can meet each other – whether at school events, open gatherings or informal encounters. A sense of community does not arise by itself, but it can be built through conscious choices.

Changing thinking – together

Public discussion around parenthood is often critical and accusatory in tone. Such an atmosphere can increase feelings of inadequacy and weaken coping. What if we changed direction?
When the focus shifts to strengths, resources and action, space is created for constructive change and hope. When parents are listened to, supported at the right time and surrounded by functioning communities, the effects extend far.

Supporting parenthood also strengthens the wellbeing of children, young people and future generations. It is therefore an investment in the future of society as a whole.

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The Strength from Parenthood project (in Finnish, Innokylä)